SILENCE

“Do your words come from more words or do they come from silence?”

As I was reading this famous quote from the German philosopher Schopenhauer, who was very much influenced by Indian Philosophy during his time, I once again remembered that a clear sign of spiritual maturing is needing less words and more silence. 

When words, thoughts, emotions come from more words, thoughts and emotions, they lose their vitality and impact. It becomes an endless stream of multiplying thoughts and magnifying emotions. 

A deeper understanding of reality and who we really are can only emerge from silence. Stilling the mind and pulling in the senses, Shama and Dhama practices, which are explained elaborately in Acharya Shunya’s Sadhana Chathustayam teachings, prepare our inner landscape for meditation and deeper insights. 

In this silence, what we have learned, heard and discussed melt away, emptying itself of words and emerging as a sound feeling of knowing. This is, in a way, an inner confirmation of the heard knowledge. But inner silence comes to us slowly. The fact of the matter is, we can roam around the world and surround ourselves with silence in the remotest temples, sanctuaries, retreat places, but we can still be bound by the incessant inner chatter of the mind which never stops and always talks back like a defiant teenager. 

I do have a postcard sitting on my study desk. There is a woman in orange clothes, reading under a magnolia tree. There is no face to her. She is just a figure sitting in silence, disconnected from the outside world.

I would like to be that woman on the postcard, sitting still under a tree, without a face and in profound silence. Opening the doors to that silence requires unloading and letting go. I trust that my teacher and the shastra will hold my hand up until I reach that gateway of inner silence. However, the real journey starts from there onwards. It is a journey all the way to the core, back to Self and it is indeed the loneliest journey of all. 

Having a guiding hand as you navigate the dark alleyways leading to inner silence is a blessing; but the real work starts when your teacher safely brings you to that gateway, gives you a pat on the back and releases you. Now you are on your own, completely free to sink back into that silence. Yet, you are afraid, disoriented and keep looking back to your teacher for her to say one more thing, explain one more verse so that you will be ready to open that door. 

This reminds me of waiting in front of a dentist’s room with an aching tooth. You know that if you are brave enough to step into the room, soon the ache will be over. Nevertheless, you have an inner resistance, because you are afraid of that unknown territory and somehow prefer to sit with the pain in the familiar environment and just bear it. 

Stepping into that silence is indeed scary. It is like a terminal illness that requires acceptance. Acceptance of the fact that you will be dying to this world and melting into that silence.

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